I was laying on the couch yesterday evening after my son had gone to bed.
I was feeling kind of bored, so I clicked open my emails. (I don’t have notifications on for them, so I have to physically open the app to see them.) It got me thinking how much life has changed recently, and from that, how tricky life has gotten. When you think about your grandparents’ generation, for example, maybe they went to work Monday to Friday, and they came home Friday at 5pm, and that was the end of it. They got to switch off until Monday morning (okay, maybe Sunday evening, if they had the Sunday scaries like some of us do!) But even if there was something stressful at work, there wasn't much they could do until they were back at work or in the office. But for us... With our fast-paced life right now - because we have access to technology 24/7 - we don't get that option anymore. We don't get that liberty. So something to think about, if you're feeling "controlled" by technology… how could you claw back control of your life, so you get a chance to switch off, or go offline, at the end of each day?
Whatever it is, I feel like we're all feeling so frenetic and crazy because we don't get a chance to switch off… ever. Even on holiday, the first thing we do usually is check our phones or log into Facebook etc! There's no judging with that: we're human, and it's human nature. But I fully believe that we can't keep going the way we're going. We have to set boundaries. So a quick question for you: what boundary do you need to set around technology? For me, I actually don't need to check my emails until 9am, for example… there's nothing urgent that needs my attention at 6am! :) As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. Drop me an email and I'll get back to you… after 9am ;) Love! Claire ❤
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Today's post is a prompt about the people in your life.
Because the people around us can have such an influence on us! I'm sure you've heard the quote about being the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. I've noticed this myself massively over the past few years. As I've got myself back on track after a difficult few years, I've been really mindful about who I have in my life, and how much energy I give to people. And it’s making a real difference. So today I wanted to share some questions about the people in your life. Work through them and note down or think of your answers, if it feels right for you. Ten questions about the people in your life...
Feel free to answer some of those questions, or all of them. You might only have one or a few people that come to mind for them. Or there might be a different person for each one. Either is fine! Next steps... Whoever comes to mind for the above are probably the "bestest" people in your life. So put them to the top of your list! And the people who make you feel the opposite? They can get a little downgrade ;) This doesn't mean that you have to cut them out your life or do anything drastic. We don't have to take life-changing action. Just use it for awareness.
In essence, put them first. I'm still learning this. Sometimes I find myself messaging people or groups I don't care for as much or know that well - purely because they're "noisier" - and then I don't have time or energy for my best peeps! Which is mad, when you think about it. So now I'm trying to put more energy on the people I love and who love me even with my flaws and annoying bits. Who are the best people in your life? And how can you move them to the top of your list? (Note: family may not be relevant in this situation. Eg: you may not call your young child in an emergency - but that doesn't mean they're not important to you!) I hope 2025 has started well for you! Claire ❤ Hey everyone!
Yesterday I met up with a friend / fellow business owner. We had a manifesting and planning session (which I hope will now become a yearly thing - it was awesome!) There’s something so fresh and exciting about a new year... all those possibilities! A chance to wipe the slate clean :) Before our session, I'd been mulling over the things I want to work towards in 2025. But before we got started, my friend suggested an exercise for wrapping up this year. It’s super simple (always a win in my book!) How it's done... We basically took a piece of paper and wrote in the middle: WHAT'S BEEN GOOD IN 2024 Then we noted down as many things as we could think of. The good thing about doing this with a (trusted) friend is that we could remind each other of things we’d done during the year. [For example, travel is really important to her, but she’d forgotten about the trips she took to Norway and Bali! For me, I could remember some of my business wins, but had forgotten about getting a place in the London marathon next year and obtaining my Mental Health First Aid qualification… oops!] It’s easy to forget all things we accomplish in a year. And small things are important too. (Eg: one of my wins was just setting a really important boundary with people in my life.) Over to you... We all know it's a busy time of year. So if you have the spoons, or you find yourself with a few minutes to reflect (waiting in the car / while the coffee pot is boiling...?) think about this simple question: What was good for you in 2024? Maybe you had a tough year and you can only think of a couple of things; that's okay*. Or maybe you've been working really hard on something, and your efforts paid off this year and you have lots to note down. Either way, while we're moving from one year to the next, it can be a nice way to close off one year by looking at what went well. So take a pen and paper, and think about the following... My good things in 2024: 1. 2. 3. (etc) *Finding it hard to think of things? That's okay! If there aren't many good things on your list for 2024, see what learning you can take from it:
(Oh, and if you'd like to share any of your "2024 good things" by email, I'd LOVE to hear them! I'll wave my virtual pom poms for you!) A final tip for this time of year... The holidays can be a crazy time. Sometimes it can be helpful to distinguish between the things YOU want to do / things that are helpful for you, Vs. things that society pressures you to do. So a reminder that:
Happy holidays to everyone who celebrates, and I will be in touch again in the new year. Much love! Claire ❤ For anyone who needs to read this...
Today's post is all about failing (or not failing, I should say). You are not failing... You are not failing if your house isn't pristine every minute of the day. Maybe you see people on Instagram with spotless houses that look like showrooms. But there's a lot they're not showing you. You're not failing if your body isn't perfect. This is a completely unreasonable expectation. [And it's kind of pointless too. What's the sense in hating our bodies - what does this do for us?!] You're not a failure if you don't have the job of your dreams... a loving family... or a yearly vacation in the sun sipping brightly-colored cocktails. So many people don't have these things. (I'm not saying it's wrong to desire these things. But you're not a failure if you don't have them, or don't want them.) You're not a failure if you shout at your kids in a moment of frustration. I don't mean like scary, angry, abusive shouting – that's an entirely different thing. I mean when you're absolutely frazzled at the end of the day and you snap at your kids, and then feel terrible and apologize. You're not a failure for doing this. And you're not a failure if you don't hit inbox zero every day. (That's something I can only dream of these days! :) The way I see it... The changes we've seen in technology over the past few decades have brought wonderful things. (If you'd have told 17-year-old me about Google maps, I would have lost my mind; no more “mapbook open on the seat, trying to get to a place you don't know, frantically turning the pages and trying not to cry or crash, or both!” :) But changes in technology have meant that everything has sped up… and I don't believe we're equipped to deal with it yet. This isn't a rant about technology. But there's a lot we're not realizing about it. Think about this... You can send a message to someone across the world and instantly see not only if it's reached them, but if they've read it or not! It’s insane, when you think about it! And yet, even in my grandparents’ generation, the main method of contact would be to send a letter, which would take a few days to arrive… and then the person would have a day or two to reply… and by the time they mailed it back, a week would have passed! Things have sped up - a lot. Know this... You are NOT a failure if you're not on top of every area your life, or following every trend. It's Just. Not. Possible. You aren’t doing anything wrong! You aren’t failing. We're just learning how to navigate this new world. [Spoiler Alert: I think it will involve lots of setting boundaries, which is not a bad thing.] You aren’t a failure if you’re not acing every single thing in your life, every single day.
There is nothing wrong with you. Anyone who looks like they're "crushing it" in everything is either lying or delusional. Everyone has setbacks. Some people just cover it up better than others (or hide it, or deny it). Don't believe the hype ;) You are enough, just being you. That’s it for this week. Enough of the harsh self-talk – let’s give ourselves some high-fives just for getting through the week! As always, I love to hear your thoughts, so feel free to pop a comment below! Hugs to you, Claire ❤ Hi, everyone!
Thoughts from this month... I was so happy last month to finally get back into my newsletters and blog posts (and thank you to everyone who sent such lovely messages in response! I really treasured them). Funnily enough, my first newsletter provided some great learning… (I do love a good learning situation ;) As I set out to write my newsletter last month, I opened up my newsletter template. And as I looked at the template, I could feel the “niggles” starting up. That little voice in my head. I looked at the picture at the top. (It’s just a generic picture of a horizon for now… not especially related to the work I do!) I could feel myself starting to get caught up on it. I started to have thoughts like: My picture isn't that relevant… what are people gonna think about it… maybe it doesn't look very professional… maybe I should find a better photo… And so on. My realization... I realized that these are the things that derail us. These are the things we get stuck on... the things that stop us from doing the (genuinely) important things. Because you know what? It doesn't really matter what image I put at the top of my newsletters! (I mean, of course it helps if it’s inspirational!) But my guess is that people didn't sign up to the newsletters because of the image at the top. My guess - or hope - is that they subscribed because of the content (or for a dose of sarcastic British humour ;) And yet, little things like this can make or break our goals. An example... One example I see in my work is with people who are starting a business. So often I hear things like: “I need to have an amazing logo, and website, and professional images, and a newsletter, and a podcast, before I can get properly started on my business…” Don’t get me wrong, these things are important. But it’s so overwhelming to think of doing them all in one go! It’s just not realistic. Of course we want our work to be as good as possible… but we also have to know when to draw the line. Taking it further… Take the example of logos - have a think about this:
I understand the temptation to get caught up in these small things, but they can really derail us. Now, I’m not saying don’t do them at all! I am saying keep a sense of perspective: - If you’re training for a 10k, you don’t necessarily need a full sports wardrobe before you start running. (You probably just need some running shoes!) - If you were trying to eat healthily but then had a piece of cake at a party, you don’t need to give up on all the work you’ve done up to that point. Final thoughts… It’s not gonna be perfect all the time. We are gonna hit stumbling blocks along the way. But it’s how we handle them that makes the difference. Approaching it with kindness (and realism) is often what we need:
So, my blue image is staying put, for now :) Maybe I’ll tackle it in the future. But for now, I know that it’s a Small Thing, so I don’t need to worry about it. [And what are the big things, for me? Writing content that people enjoy. Doing work that genuinely helps people. And trying to live up to my potential, so I can inspire others to do the same.] So, my question to you today is: What are YOUR big things? (the things that are really important to you) And are you focusing on them... or on the things that don’t really matter? Go gentle with yourself. We’re all just learning in this game called Life! See you next month. Blue pic and all :) Love, Claire ❤ Ahem. I haven't written a blog post in an incredibly long time.
Some of you (many of you even!) may not even remember who I am. That's ok - reintroductions are a-comin’ :) A summary of goings-on... Unfortunately I've had a really difficult few years. I went through an incredibly difficult time personally – one that I'm still coming out of, to be honest. And anyone who's been through a really difficult time will know that you fall into a (figurative) pit, and it can take a long time to claw your way out. Well, I've been clawing for the last few years! But, I am BACK, and doing much better. (Hooray!) The “funny” thing about having an intense personal setback is that sometimes you come out like yourself, but a whole new model: remade and rebuilt and 100 times stronger. I'm not back to exactly where I want to be yet, but I'm back enough to know that it's time to start blogging again. A bit about me… I’m Claire, and I'm an Accountability and Goals coach. I work with people to get a clear idea of what to work on each week, so they can tick the important things off their to-do list, rather than bumping them to the next day... (or week, or month - yes, I see you! ;) I've been an accountability coach for about seven or eight years. I used to think that my job was “just" accountability, but over the years I've learned that there are three components to what I do. -> The first is accountability, of course. Checking in with people and cheering them on. But before you can even start working on your goals, you need to know what they are. -> So I help people get crystal clear on their goals - what they want their life to look like (and then we make progress towards that). -> The third part is often overlooked but I think it's the most essential… our self-talk. The way we talk to ourselves - that voice inside your head. Not in a “crazy” way, but I think most of us have that constant chatter in the background. And for many of us, that voice is pretty harsh! So a lot of my work is drawing attention to that voice, and talking back to it… (because honestly, most of the time the stuff it's telling us is bullsh*t!) So that's the focus of my work and these posts:
If that sounds like your thing, I look forward to having you along for the ride! My promise to you... For those of you who remember my blog posts from back in the day, I always tried to be as open and honest as I could in them. [Example: total honesty moment - I've drafted about 10 of these “Hello, remember me?!” posts, but I kept deleting them cause I wasn't happy with them!] It was a good lesson in not needing things to be perfect all the time. This blog post isn't perfect… but it doesn't need to be. Sometimes we just need to focus on the main goal - what outcome we want. My main goal today is just to say: “Hey! It's Claire. It’s been a really long time… but I hope you still enjoy reading these posts”. My aim for my blog posts is to make you feel better about yourself and give you inspiration. Final thing… I hope you're doing well, and I'm sending tons of love to wherever you are in the world. I always love hearing from people, so feel free to shoot me a line telling me about yourself and your goals if you like! Please know that you are important in the world - and I’ll see you next month! :) Claire ❤ We’ve had snow here this week, which has been really pretty.
I went out walking with my son today, and held his hand to make sure he didn’t slip over, as it was icy in places. And as we came to a patch of ice on the path, I deliberately walked on the safe, non-icy part. Today I wanted to share some questions I wrote for The Bullish Society (where I'm a freelance coach), on wrapping up 2020, and planning for 2021 - as much as we can.
I haven't blogged for a while.
Partly due to time, but also because I got all in my head about how my blog posts weren't any good... (full disclosure there!) Keeping pesky thoughts in check is an ongoing process :) I finally managed to kick those thoughts aside, and I'm back... with a short post, and a new program announcement... woo hoo! For a while, I've been getting up early before my son and husband are awake, to have time to myself and get things done (hooray!)
If I'm lucky, I get two or three hours (they are long sleepers!) But sometimes my son wakes up early, and then I have an hour or less to do my work. |
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