Dear soul,

There's something I need you to know. 

Something I think you've forgotten. 

It might seem trite, but I think it's important. 

Because you need to know how amazing you are. 

How special you are. 

Because I'm guessing you don't see it. 

...

I know you see all the things that are wrong with you, or all the things you've done wrong. 

I know you see all the ways that you're lacking, and how you're not as far ahead as the people around you. 

You may not always feel beautiful... but I bet there is someone who thinks you are f*cking amazing. 

You may not be where you want to be in life or have the business or job that you want... but I bet that you just being there is making someone's life better.

You may feel old and crumbly and haggard - and maybe when you look in the mirror you don't like what you see - but I bet you've made a baby laugh. 

I bet you've brought someone to tears (maybe without even knowing it) because of a kindness you've done. 

I bet that you just listening to someone or being there for them has turned their day around. 

You don't see all these things, but I see them.

...

I see the strength it takes to keep going when you feel you've got nothing more to give.

I see your beauty and strength and calm as you face challenges other people haven't had to face. 

And I see your spirit shining through as you blaze a path other people would never have the courage to start down. 

So stop with the hating on yourself.

You're an awesome person, in so many ways. 

[I've been doing an exercise on this recently where I write down positive things people have said about or to me over the years, and I read them every day, before I check my phone. I can't tell you how powerful it is!]

It doesn't matter about the mistakes you've made. 

Keep making them! 

Mistakes help us grow.

It doesn't matter that you don't know what you're doing. 

None of us know what we're doing (some people just pretend better than others, or are in complete denial!)

Today, friend, just know that you're doing absolutely fine... just the way you are... just as you are now. 

No changes needed, because we like you just as you are :) 

...

A short one for today - sometimes needed! 

Love,
  
Claire  

​❤

Sunshine among the clouds...

It might feel like there's a lot of crap in the world right now.
 
And I'm not denying that worrying things are happening.
 
But it can feel overwhelming when we think about everything going on.
 
The news especially can be so negative:
 
The world’s coming to an end… AI robots will have taken over within 3 years… the planet’s only got 20 years left…

Now, I’m not denying that bad things aren't happening.
 
But I want to offer another point of view.

Because think about this...

Right now, somewhere in the world:
 

• A nurse has just doubled her shift, because a coworker called in sick and there's no one else to cover the children in her ward.
  
  
• A teacher is desperately trying to find last-minute help for a child she's worried about in her class. 
  
  
• A journalist has just started unearthing a story that will bring an end to years of abuse in a key organization.
  
  
• There are people volunteering all over the world in soup kitchens and charitable organizations, night after night.  

 
Of course, I don't know for sure that those things are happening right now.
 
But I know that they happen. All the time.
 
And I get that those situations come from a depressing place: the overstretched hospital; the underfunded school; the toxic workplace, etc...
 
But that’s usually all we hear about.

My take on it...
 
I'm not saying that “bad people” or bad actions don't exist.
 
I've had my fair (unfair?) share of terrible doctors, unprofessional lawyers, and uncaring social workers, so I know it happens.
 
But for every “bad” person or event, there's a good one as well.
 
Maybe even two!
 
For everyone doing something shitty, there is someone else working to make the world a better place.

An exercise you can try:
 

1. Take out a sheet of paper or start a new list on your phone. Start making a note of all the good you notice or hear about in the world.
   
   Anything good, no matter how small:
   
   - A teenager stopping to hold a door open for an elderly person.
   - A stranger that says “bless you” in the bank when you sneeze.
   - A mailman that stops to stroke a cat as they’re doing their rounds.
   
   
2. Read your list every single morning.
   
   (Even better, before you check your phone!)
   
   See if it makes a difference it makes to your mood and how you approach your day.
   
   
3. Keep adding to your list.
   
   See how long you can get it.
   
   One page… two?
   
   As you go about your week, try to find extra things for your list:
   
   A businessman you saw smiling at a baby… a neighborhood kid raising money for charity… new flowers planted in your local community…

 
They’re only small things; I get that.
 
But good things are out there, all the time.
 
We’re bombarded with messages saying “the world is sh*tty and falling apart”.
 
But I don't think that's true.

If it was true, it would have happened by now. 

So keep fighting... keep believing... keep loving... keep listening to your heart and not the news.
 
There will always be that negative 1%.
 
But the positive 99% are out there, slogging away.
 
Quietly working away in the background... and they're not giving up ;)
 
Love to you... til next month!
 
Claire  

❤

More like this...

A message of encouragement for you

My antidote to bad news...

A short reminder that things are going to be okay

My son just finished school for the summer holidays and things have been a bit crazy. 
 
Maybe it's the same where you are.
 
Or maybe you don't have kids, but you have a busy summer ahead of you.
 
Either way, I’ve found that when things are hectic, my thoughts tend to go in one direction… downwards!

Some examples...
 

• My house is a mess - my son and our cat seem to be on a mission to Make A Mess in every room, every day :)
  
  
• I went on an inflatable obstacle course earlier this week and hurt my back by jumping badly, and now I feel stupid.
  
  
• I planned to eat a healthy breakfast this morning but instead I’ve just had coffee.
  
  
• I tried a new energy bar recipe but I didn’t have enough honey so I used sugar instead, and they came out disgusting and gloopy :D

 
I don’t know about you, but I can usually think of a zillion things I’m doing wrong at any given time.
 
I wonder if you’re the same.

Over to you...
 
If I asked you right now, I bet most of you could instantly list ten things you’re “messing up”, or things you could be doing better.
 
[I snapped at my kids… my closet is a mess… I haven’t called my mom/sister/grandad for weeks… I ate a full pack of cookies last night…]
 
It’s so easy to think of all the things we’re doing “wrong”.
 
Don’t get me wrong - it’s important to take stock and learn from our mistakes… that’s where the growth happens.
 
But sometimes we go too far, and end up focusing solely on our failures.

A challenge for this week...
 
If you can relate, hit pause for a minute and think about the following:
 
What are you doing “right”?
 
[By “right”, I don’t mean correctly or perfectly… I mean in opposition to the things you feel you’re messing up or doing wrong.]
 
It’s so easy to remember the “bad” things: the conversation where you said something stupid; the room in your house filled with boxes and clutter; the way other people seem to be crushing it and you just managed to have a shower today…
 
So often, we see the “bad” in ourselves and not the good.
 
So if you have a minute, take out a pen and paper, and make a list…
 
What are you doing "right", right now?!
 
What good things are you doing that you might have missed?
 

• Maybe you’re caring for an elderly parent while juggling working and being a parent.
  
  
• Maybe you’re struggling with depression, but you showed up to volunteer at a local community project.  
  
  
• Maybe you were really patient with your child or nibling even though you were having a tough day.
  
  
• Maybe you were super tired, but you stayed late to help a co-worker who was struggling.

 
Cause here's the thing:
 
I bet that for every mistake you make, there are 10 things you're doing “right” as well.
 
And “right” doesn’t have to be noteworthy or incredible.
 
It might just be surviving.
 
It might be commonplace.
 
Surviving, keeping the peace, or simply ticking along are all wins!
 
So my advice for today: try to find something you’re doing well, every time you berate yourself for doing something wrong.

Examples from my own life...
 
- It’s the summer holidays and I’m a solo parent, but I’m still managing to send this newsletter.
 
- I didn’t eat well this morning, but I did make some healthy granola the other day and it didn’t take long (i.e. I can quickly and easily do it again!)
 
- I was stupid in hurting my back, but I found some great strength exercises for when I’m feeling better - and now I have the motivation to do them! :)

Final words...
 
We’re always gonna mess up; that’s a given - especially if you’re striving to improve yourself (which so many of you here are, in wonderful ways!)
 
But throughout all the mishaps and mess-ups, we often forget the things we’re doing well in the day-to-day.
 
So remember the balance:
 
“Yes I messed up, but I also had these wins…”
 
“Yes that conversation wasn’t great, but I had just worked a 12-hour shift…”
 
“Yes I did go to bed late last night… but hopefully I’ll be really tired for tonight!?!”
 
Your comments and thought are welcome as always!

Love,
 
Claire  

❤

​We’ve had snow here this week, which has been really pretty.
 
I went out walking with my son today, and held his hand to make sure he didn’t slip over, as it was icy in places.
 
And as we came to a patch of ice on the path, I deliberately walked on the safe, non-icy part.

I haven't posted for a week or two. To be honest, I've been struggling with what to say. My creativity has really dried up. ​